Hang On!
I was standing on the edge of the platform. I was waiting for my train to the USA, my favourite place. The man close to me was on his phone. Then something weird happened. Then was an almighty rumble and out of nowhere, a train came roaring by! There was a thing on the top that said: “Next stop to the USA!” This was my chance! I snached the cam off the man. He got his phone and dialed 111. After 1 minute, The police cars were right next to the automatic door. They smashed the door and asked the man “where was the kid?’’ The man pointed right at me. The train driver said in a loud voice: “Train leaving the platform in 5 seconds. 5… 4… 3… 2… I grabbed the train door and it automatically opened. 1… I dived head first into the train. 0…” The police had no time to get me. They growled at the man. I think they were mad that the man didn't help them catch me. Good thing I went just in time!
By Dahran
Ka pai Dahran - I enjoyed reading your writing. I can see you have thought carefully about what words to use to add interest and impact. Great word choices/phrases include: almighty rumble, roaring, snatched, smashed, dived head first and growled.
ReplyDeleteI wonder what will happen next? Are you doing Part 2 or starting a new piece of writing?